Phone Call 1: "Hello (me) this is (some random name I can't understand) calling you about a business matter. Could you please call us back very soon. This is not a sales call, this is a legitimate business matter that we need to hear from you about soon.
Phone Call 2 (to my office!): "Hello (me) this is (some random name that I cannot UNDERSTAND) I am calling from Card Services please call me back at (some 800 number) as soon as possible (doesn't tell me which card she's calling about though) so that we can address your account. Thank you.
Phone Call 3 (TO MY PARENT'S HOUSE): "Hello is (me) there?" "No." "Is this (Me's) Mother?" (It was my mother by the way, she's retired now and watches a lot of One Life to Live.) "No this is not (Me's) Mother. This is the housekeeper. I don't know anything." "Oh, well, do you have any idea Housekeeper, how to get in touch with (Me?)." "I don't, I'm just the Housekeeper, I just clean the house." "Well, can you give a message to (Me)?" "How could I? I don't even know who that is." (My mom is good).
Letter # 1: Dear (Me), we recently noticed that you missed a payment so now we're going to start calling you all over the place and try to guilt you into making a payment even though you've always paid on time before, we figure we should bug you, because we think that you have a TON of mone but you are just holding on to it, not paying it to us because you like to hear from us and/or you need some good old fashioned peer pressure in order to pay up. -Card Services
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